CHILDHOOD DOTTED WITH BODIES.
LET THEM GO, LET THEM
BE GHOSTS.
“NO,” I SAID,
“MAKE THEM STAY, MAKE THEM STONE.”
Gregory Orr, from “Origin of the Marble Forest
The picture above is from a war memorial garden I visited during the holidays. I find it ironic, in the sense that in front of such deep, thoughtful, and somber display is a wide array of tourists posing with a smile. The stones looked cold, the flowers smelled like dust.
Apparently I cold mourn death I've never known about.
It is almost September and I'm mourning the things I've lost.
More specifically, the things I've yet to lose.
School and lessons have eaten up so much of my time that I'm left with barely any seconds to spend with the people I should dedicate my life to.
It feels odd and disgruntling, like everyday I come back to the home of a stranger.
"Burn all your bridges," they said "Then build them again with thicker ropes." But how would I do that when I know things are only about to get worse.
I shed tears in the form of acid but still hope for someone to wipe them for me.
My hands, as ever, are empty.
The fact that they are so indulgent of my frequent breakdowns makes it harder for me to think about not failing them.
All the things I've done, everything I've been through, they have always been for them.
They can't be for nothing.
More specifically, the things I've yet to lose.
School and lessons have eaten up so much of my time that I'm left with barely any seconds to spend with the people I should dedicate my life to.
It feels odd and disgruntling, like everyday I come back to the home of a stranger.
"Burn all your bridges," they said "Then build them again with thicker ropes." But how would I do that when I know things are only about to get worse.
I shed tears in the form of acid but still hope for someone to wipe them for me.
My hands, as ever, are empty.
The fact that they are so indulgent of my frequent breakdowns makes it harder for me to think about not failing them.
All the things I've done, everything I've been through, they have always been for them.
They can't be for nothing.